Hey, thanks for participating in our new program! We know how hard it is to produce a sperm sample at the doctor’s office, it’s so cold, sterile, and the magazines totally suck. So, we’ve decided to test out this new program where we have a nurse come into your own home and collect your sample! Oh, and one other thing – the nurse is more than happy to uh, “help” you produce that sample. Nurse Tiffy has a very specific set of instructions for you – follow them exactly and we’ll make sure you get a realllyyyy big sample.