Your coach says you haven’t been doing as well at football practice. He thinks something’s on your mind, distracting you while you’re on the pitch? Do you know what it might be? Hmmmm… I think you’ve just given me the answer. I should’ve known… my boy loves breasts! Is it mommy’s breasts that have been distracting you all this time or any woman’s? Well, no matter, I know how to fix you right up – and fix your game! Now, I want you to pull down your pants, grab ahold of that “problem,” and jerk it for me – yes, right in front of me – while directing all of your attention on mommy’s big boobies. Yes, ALL YOUR ATTENTION. Trust me; this will do the trick!